I wish that I had had demisexual representation in the media growing up.
It feels like so many people I know who are queer had an “aha, that’s what I am moment!” while watching television. They had already been wondering what the name for their experience was when Maureen said “I’m bisexual” out loud in rent. The aha! happens — and suddenly there’s a word for what they are. There’s a confirmation that other people are like you, too — you’re not some bizarre outlier to whom no one can relate. You have a community and friends. You just have to find them.
I didn’t get that. There aren’t demisexual characters in television and movies — at least, not that I know of at the time of writing this. There weren’t asexual characters on screen that I knew of as a child, either. We are starting to finally get some asexual character representation on screen. It’s miles ahead of where we were just ten years ago. As a demisexual, however, this would have served to both confirm and confuse my experience. Most of the time I didn’t have sexual attraction growing up, except for one or two instances in serious relationships. My aha! moment came on Tumblr, years later, and I fought with it for a long time because I didn’t want to steal or use a label that wasn’t my own. It had to happen several times for me to accept myself, and even now, it can be difficult.
